Wednesday, October 1, 2014

It's just another morning and I'm trying to figure out what I want to do today.  I think I may clean or make a pie.  Or go for a jog (ha ha ha).  Not making fun of those serious joggers out there or anything, but I can't do that s**t.  Maybe if it was dark out and no one could see me it would be nice. I'm not sure why, but I'm really self conscious about people seeing me run?  And I probably looked like an idiot the last time I tried it xD  Imagine this: a girl who probably looks either emo or like a skater girl running down the side of the road...well, I just started fidgeting with my necklace.  But I didn't want to take it off because I didn't want to lose it.  That thing is very special to me.  Anyways, I'm pretty sure I looked stupid (lol).

Jarred and I take Stumpy to this nature trail thing to walk him and there is a creek there.  We decided to go fossil hunting on Sunday and we found a ton of them.  That was a lot of fun.  

Um....Cassy gave me some of her old shirts that she didn't want anymore.  They were all pretty much plain except for one.  When Jarred saw it, he was all "Nice!  It's a Game of Thrones shirt!" and I had no idea what that was.  So he pulled it up and played it for me.  It's an alright show.  I've only seen 6 episodes and have no idea what's going on (I'm going to start over).  He then told me there was a book and I was (O.O).  I asked him to get it from someone he works with so I may get to read it tomorrow!! :D

So Jarred's at work currently.  I get to pick him up :D  Obviously, he has a vehicle, but we have to do stuff with it later.  It needs an oil change and I think we're going to do it together when he gets out.  Speaking of oil changes, when I got my car, it was due for one.  So I bought the oil and the filter myself and went over to my parents' house.  I did everything.  My father just talked me through it.  I felt good after changing my own oil :33

Last night his cousin called and we got to skype with her.  She showed us a little of where she was staying.  I was surprised at the end of the conversation when she was picking on me for not calling or texting her.  I never knew she actually wanted to talk to me (lol).  

So, yeah, I miss the days where I would take him to work and pick him up.  When we first started going out, he got that job.  He would always ask if I wanted to stay the night and it became a regular thing.  Then I got a job.  I obviously still came over to his house and I would take him to work the days that I had to work.  Then when I got out, I would pick him up.  It was perfect.  Then it pretty much stopped when I was moved to closing (I think I mentioned it before that it was 7:30-1).  For those who know what it's like working a night shift, and living half an hour/45 minutes away from work, you would probably know it's a b****.  
Everyday he would go to work at 7 in the morning and work until around 6.  Then sometimes I would pick him up and rush to work.  I would be there until 1 or 1:30 then drive home.  By the time I got home it would be about 2 and I wouldn't be able to sleep until 4 or 5.  Then he'd have to leave at 7.  :3 

This is just different.  I don't think I've been this happy for a while.  Yeah, it sounds somewhat cliche and I'm sure there is someone who is thinking I'm trying to make them jealous, but it's not what my intention is.  I've grown up a little.
For the last 4 months, I've reflected myself and what I've done to people.  I wasn't a great person.  I did things mostly for selfish reasons.  I hurt a lot of people and have made people mad.  This makes me think of Jarred.  He had told me about his past and how he had come to terms with who he was.  He told me that he wanted to be a better person so he thought of the things he could change that would make him better and he did them.  I think I've finally started to do that.  

I'm sorry to those who I have hurt or used.  I was acting on anger that was built up for years.  With that serious note, I'm going to end my entry for today.  I hope you have a good day.

Oh, I'm also thinking of starting another blog.  Something with more meaning than crap about me.  If I do decide to start over, I will let you know.

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